Run, Steph, Run!

Just do it! …tomorrow? Motivation woes.

After the epic/traumatic 15-mile run/walk on Monday, my body was in major need of recovery. It seemed reasonable for me to take yesterday off, but when it came down to actually doing my short 3-mile run today, I was stuck in “Blah” mode. You would think that five weeks into my 18-week marathon training program, I would be in a “just do it!” groove. Instead, I find myself hemming, hawing, and making excuses for why I can’t do my long runs on Saturday or Sunday (the last two have been on Mondays) or why I can just skip one of my mid-week short runs. 

I end up feeling anxious about running, then beat myself up for my lack of willpower and motivation. More interestingly, I’m baffled. A major reason that I fell in love with running over the last two years was that I had learned how to discipline myself and to do so in a way that was not just painless but shockingly enjoyable! I would wake up at 7am, get my gear on, and jog over to Lake of the Isles with a spring in my step from the feeling of accomplishment of just getting up and out of the door at that hour. I relished my long runs, again early in the morning, looking forward to each goal to tackle. I never listened to music. All I needed were the songs of nature and the thump, thump of fellow runners on the Grand Rounds pathways. I felt empowered and strong, affirmed with every step.

But this time around with the new goal of doing 26.3 miles, not 10 or 13.1, I am feeling like a whiny loser. My thoughts and feelings frequently go to how difficult the run is going, how slow I am running, how humiliated I will feel if I cannot finish by the 6-hour time limit (or would somehow give up before the finish). My past experience training for other races suggests that I have the physical capacity and discipline to do these four-times-a-week runs, with this week’s 10 mile long run a challenge but not impossible. The problem is that my fears seem to be getting in the way. I’m a big believer in the mind-body connection, and this is definitely a situation where the two are not in harmony. Not surprisingly, I find myself in a very similar dynamic when it comes to my graduate school anxieties. Perhaps more self-reflection on the struggle with running will help me become more successful in school - and vice versa. 

I’ve considered training myself in relaxation and mindfulness exercises to help me run with more clear-headedness. If any of you have suggestions or advice, that would be appreciated. Because I still have 13 weeks to go, and I gotta get my head in the game!

Run, Steph, Run! Blog, Steph, Blog!

Hi Guys,

I started another Tumblr! This time, I’m blogging about all the things running related, particularly as a way to keep myself accountable. Why do I need extra accountability? Well, that’s because I decided to sign up for the Twin Cities Marathon on Saturday, October 2nd (a day before I turn 29 years old!). I always told myself that I wanted to try running a marathon before I turn 30, and this is the last fall that I know I’ll be in the Twin Cities for certain before that milestone. Even though I’ve run two half-marathons, a 10-mile race, and lots of of miles in between, I’m pretty nervous about training for and running a marathon and have already faced some challenges mentally and physically in my first month of training. 

I also want to stay in touch with friends and family because I’m going to use this personal challenge as a way to raise awareness of Rett Syndrome and fundraise for the International Rett Syndrome Foundation. My goddaugther, Melaina, was recently diagnosed with Rett Syndrome, which is a neurological disorder that results in stagnation of or regression in development.

Beautiful Melaina with her beautiful mama!

Here is a short description of the diagnosis from the IRSF and a description of how the IRSF makes use of donations:

Rett syndrome is an X-linked neurological disorder, and 1 of only 4 diseases that occurs almost exclusively in girls. And although it is genetic, it is not hereditary, so parents have no idea their infant has this syndrome until between 6-18 months of age, when she unexplainably plateaus in development or suffers a devastating regression, leading to severe lifelong motor apraxia affecting speech, hand use, mobility and even the ability to eat or breathe easily for the rest of her long life. A child is born with Rett syndrome approximately every 2 hours.

The work of the IRSF is to accelerate current groundbreaking research that is making experts believe that Rett syndrome may be the first neurologic disorder to be reversed at any age, and may be the Rosetta Stone to fighting monumental diseases like Alzheimer’s, Parkinson’s, autism, and more. And while IRSF funds research grants and important research symposia to bring this Research to Reality, we also provide critical support and information to the families supporting their daughters with Rett syndrome every day. Most of the research funding and family support provided by the foundation comes from fundraisers large and small held by parents and friends.

Melaina’s parents and I are looking into how to best approach the fundraising process, so stay tuned. I would like to ask for supporters to pledge a donation of $1 per mile of the marathon (26.3) or whatever you can afford! If you have any experience with fundraising of this sort or know of matching funds programs for charity donations, let me know! 

I’m looking forward to using this blog to talk through the marathon training process, share information, and connect with others. I hope you join me on the journey! Don’t forget to Follow/RSS/bookmark! :) Thanks!

Regards,

Steph